CurrentMom

Confessions of a Freelancing Mother

Family Friday

Guest post by Charlotte Foreman, of BestChickLit.com.

The majority of freelance writers need, to some degree, peace and quiet. So how do you achieve this when you have two school-age children, one preschooler and a husband who also works from home? I know it's harsh to say, but my heart sinks just a little when I hear that all-too-familiar early morning call of "Mummy?" from the top of the stairs, just ten minutes after I have begun work. How do they know I am up? I am deathly quiet every morning, but still they manage to interrupt my early work session every day. The mind boggles and I have, in desperation, come up with the following conspiracy theory: there is some sort of alarm/beacon embedded in my laptop that somehow alerts my children when switched on.

It's not that I begrudge spending time with my children. This is exactly the reason I rise at stupid-o'clock every weekday morning to try to get as much work done as possible before the children get up, and so "mommy's work" doesn't intrude too much on the rest of our day. But no, whatever my logic, my children simply do not share my reasoning and as far as they are concerned, as soon as I get up I am fair game. Apart from this situation leading to a rather frustrated mother, the early mornings can also lead to some very tired and grumpy children, which then has a knock-on effect on rest of the day. My life seems to consist of me sneaking in little bits of work here and there between outings, meals, games and housework.

Sometimes, You Just Gotta Unplug

Tech Tuesday

It goes without saying that it would be a large adjustment for me to continually get through my daily life without technology. The fact that the family business involves electronics means I really wouldn't have the same daily life. I appreciate all that these advances have done for me - 

• The apps that track my to-dos/appointments
• The fun games that give me a small break
• The TV/DVD that allows authors creations to come to life before me

For all that I enjoy about technology, there are certain things that make it bloody annoying. And for those reasons we've all experienced, sometimes I just want a break. 

A weekend; maybe a week, tops. That's not too much to ask, right? After all, it's not as if I have to leave all my electronic leashes at home. I just can exert a bit more control over when I allow them to control me. Like checking for voicemail at the end of a day, instead of answering my cell every time it rings, or screening right then and calling "important" people back right away. 

I don't need a laptop to have fun. I don't need to be doing work 24/7, either. If I can't check my email on my phone, that's another gadget I can look at only when I decide I want to. If I decide I don't want to until I get back - so be it.

You might be thinking at this point either A) This is impossible or B) One would need to book a vacation at some exclusive resort and spa far away from daily life in order to accomplish this.

Not really. 

It's a decision you make. You could vacation in your own home just as easily as somewhere else! Sure, you'd still have to do some cleanup unless you hired a maid for the weekend, but treating yourself doesn't have to mean breaking the bank. You know those commercials where the kids are camping-out in the backyard? Why can't you do that?! You don't have to pay the campground fees, you're guaranteed electricity and if you forgot to pack something really important you aren't that far from home. 

Personally, I love camping. Ironically, I also love the idea of living in a world devoid of technology. When I feel the need to escape life, I camp-out with my fellow members of The Society for Creative Anachronism. There's nothing like putting on clothing from the middle ages and learning crafts that are in danger of dying-out that makes you forget all about answering your phone or constantly updating your Facebook status. (Psst - they'll also come in handy after the Zombie Apocalypse.)

That's just me, of course. You can just pitch a regular tent, in regular clothes, and enjoy the wilderness. If you just aren't an outdoorsy person, well, hotels work too. Just remember to turn-off your cellphone or leave it in the room when you go out. 

After all, relaxation may have a different meaning to many of us, but I haven't found anyone yet that finds the constant ringing/binging or general noise of their world puts them in a state of Zen.

Photo by Me (ZafraD) from my flickr

I want kids parties to be on Facebook!

Family Friday

I know in my reality at least, if you're having an event you invite folks on Facebook. Depending on the event, you might not put out paper invitations at all. The sellers of all things party might not appreciate it much but just look at the newspaper industry - your days are numbered, too.

Of course, most of these events still happen in the real world. You're expected to attend and interract with other people. Mostly, I'm ok with that. I run a sci-fi meetup that brings me into physical contact with other humans, in addition to other related events. 

When it comes to kids' birthday parties though, my shoes fill with lead. 

Let's face it - unless you're perhaps one of those moms living vicariously through your child, just about everyone I've ever ran into at a kids birthday party would rather be anywhere else. The running, the screaming, the expense. Even Christmas doesn't compare for most people unless they have a giant gift-giving swap with all the relatives on Christmas morning. 

The kids have fun, it's true. They see their friends, they play, sugar is consumed in mass quantities and they (hopefully) run around and play some more. For them, it's a giant holiday. With presents. And cake.

For us, it's a bottle of excedrin and/or a few alcoholic drinks of choice. 

But fear not! I have a solution. Social Media.

'But the kids won't be able to play together!' You say. If they are old enough, they are probably on Facebook, too. If not, they might all play the same online game - let them play it together. If your kids are of a toddler age, well, there's Clara Beane to help you feel just a little bit better about yourself. 

If you belong to the tech elite, you probaby have a Google+ account. Great! Just start a hangout with those you want to invite and get the party started. Everyone can be involved and no one has to complain about not having their preferred flavor of cake.

Of course, I realize this will probably never happen. Unless global warming and climate disaster force us to live entirely indoors, humans will still have the desire to venture out into the world and connect with each other in person. Struggling as they might be, we still have malls. Parks are visited quite frequently. And though I try very hard to avoid the place, our Chuck E Cheese here usually has a pretty full parking lot. 

So, invite me. I know you will. I'll even accept, if only because my daughter is always in the mood to run around and ingest as much sugar as her diabetic body can handle on special occasions. 

Just don't be surprised if I have my iPhone in one hand and a wine glass in the other.

I Love You, too. Now Please Go Away.

Tech Tuesday

Like so many other parents, I had all sorts of plans before my daughter was born. I got a Pack-N-Play for her to lie in while I worked on the computer. A sling to carry her around in so I had my hands free. 

You know what happened, don't you. None of it!

When she was born, her personality started showing just about the time they pullled her out and announced "it's a girl". It wasn't what I planned for, but I was grateful to have a daughter who had her own mind and wasn't afraid to stand up for what she thought. At the age of three we determined she was going to be a lawyer. 

Things I Love About the Internet - Part 1

Tech Tuesday

Everyone is always talking about all the bad stuff online. I know that’s the job of the news agencies - they get paid to scare us - but millions of people still travel to cyberspace every day.

There's got to be a good reason, right?

The reason in some cases is hard to figure out - cyberbullying, online hate crimes and destructive websites come to mind. I suppose it's all a part of the human experience and at least we can actively choose not to visit those portions of the web we find disturbing. I find some peoples obsession with TMZ.com disturbing so that proves it's all a matter of relevance.

For all the current and potential pitfalls and dangerous information to be found, there are several reasons I am a huge fan of the internet and in some cases, don't wish to remember all that well what life was like without it. In the next series of posts I will be discussing those reasons starting now with:
Like-Minded People.