The Making of a Milestone

Therapy Tuesday
Photo by: Lars F

In the past few weeks, it's been particularly hard to parent amidst the news chatter that we all invariably soak up. (Despite many of my attempts to ignore the news, it seems to creep in on me). It seems nearly impossible, for example, to not share in one of a parent's greatest nightmare as in Trayvon's death.

But I'm determined to keep this post upbeat. Or at least upbeat in its trivialities. Part of our daily balance is to help filter our internal dramas from those in the outside world. The external incidents can make us freeze up and be paralyzed emotionally. I want to celebrate a milestone that occurred not directly with one of my children, but for me as a parent.

In making plans for this past weekend, I received an email from a parent in my son's class. She suggested a play-date, and we were able to arrange the details. I arrived at her house with both kids in tow, as I figured I would give my husband a few hours to get some stuff done. I hadn't met these parents beyond in passing at school, but I figured I'd enjoy getting to know new people. After some pleasantries, the other mother said, "So, do you want to pick him up at 5:30? I figure any sooner, and my son will be upset."  In that moment, it was like angels in heaven started to sing.

I had scored what seemed to be the unobtainable: The Drop-Off Play-date. This was a huge parental milestone--it meant that I didn't have to be saddled to all of my son's plans. (Fortunately, I still have a few more years of dual play-dates). 

We are so consumed with the milestones of our children--are they on time, appropriate, and all other measures of normal. We tend to overlook the parallel milestones that occur in parents. Often, these are far more subtle: going out on a date night, the drop off play-date, the drop off birthday party...

What are some of your parental milestones that you have acheived or look forward to?

Comments

[Karen]

I still remember my first drop-off playdate for my now-16-year-old - he was about 4 at the time, and I did not have younger children yet. I could not believe that there was someone who was willing to take my child for the 2 hours or so she had him (the playdate was the youngest of three, so this was an experienced parent.) I went to the mall and bought the mom a present, even though I didn't know her very well. She thought it was funny, but i was in 7th heaven!! Definitely a parenting milestone. Of course, by the time the other two came along, I pushed for child-only playdates from a very young age :)