CurrentMom

An American Coat of Many Colors

Truth Thursday

Ghana.
Rwanda.
Ethiopia.
Philippines.
England.
Bolivia.
Zimbabwe.
El Salvador.

These are the countries from which eight children in my son’s fifth grade class are first generation immigrants. 

That’s not to mention the boy who was adopted from Japan, or the girl who was adopted from China, or the girls whose father was a Zambian doctor. Or the children whose families hail from Poland, Germany, Russia and Israel at least a couple of generations ago.

So of the 25 kids in his class, more than half are either first generation immigrants, or have families that have roots in other countries.

Sitting in the classroom at Piney Branch Elementary School is like a social studies lesson in micro globalization. I had the great fortune to be there last month for the annual international feast, the school’s solution to the December holiday mayhem.

In preparation for their party, the students composed poems, “Where I’m From,” and wrote reports on their country of origin. These poems have always been one of my favorite pieces of the 5^th grade curriculum, as even the most non-poetic student will string together several words of beauty as he or she describes his or her roots.

What's Your Resol-You-Tion?

Therapy Tuesday
Photo by: Noelle Buske

Happy New Year. I promise that this won't be another thing that chirps around the idea of a resolution. This won't be about those 10 vanity pounds that you want to lose. Or the promise that you made to yourself to be more involved at your kid's school. This is not about a superficial resolution, that tends to get broken about a quarter of the way through the year, despite good intentions.

No, this is about you. You are your core. Your fundamental self. When was the last time you did an inventory about what you like and dislike about yourself? (Again, I'm not talking about those vanity pounds). These are the difficult things to change. Those things that tend to linger, because they take real work to do something about.

This is the kind of resolution, or resol-YOU-tion that I'm talking about and the type that I'm working on myself. Not taking the people that I love for granted. Touching base. Being vulnerable and intimate. These aren't easy things, especially if recent patterns indicate otherwise.

These are core aspects, and changing them usually involves enlisting help. This help can come in multiple forms: if you are able, professional help is ideal (and doesn't mean that you are crazy). Otherwise, asking a spouse, close friend, or relative to point out (in a way that you can hear and tolerate) when you are acting with old patterns. This requires some pre-thought: what do you need so you can hear the cue so you can change your behavior? Sometimes, a random seeming word helps, so that defenses don't surround you like armor.

Resolutions are supposed to make us happier. They are measurable and time limited (lasting within a year or some goal-oriented date). They are helpful in reaching smaller and more superficial kinds of goals. I use the word superficial because they tend to be things that we are able to share with others without feeling threatened by doing so. Resol-YOU-tions are changing internal parts of you that might not be obvious to those around you. They are slow to alter. But they also bring happiness.

What are your Resol-You-tions?

Festive but Laid Back: New Year's Eve at Home with Champagne and Caviar

 

Meal Monday 

I've always had New Year's Eve fantasies. Visions of glamorous parties, little black dresses and martini glasses dance in my head. These daydreams include tinkling ice, art deco furnishings, fabulous fashions and accessories. Audrey Hepburn always figures prominently in these midnight cocktail party dreams, snow flurries fall lightly outside and it's all very magical.  

Unfortunately, these fantasies have never been realized. When I was young and single, New Year's sometimes meant a college or grad school party with friends but without glamor or romance. After I got married, we would often share the evening with another couple and eventually with another family whose children's ages matched ours. For the past few years, we have spent the holiday at our very quiet place in the Maine woods, tranquil but -- as the kids are very quick to point out -- boring. 

This year, I sent an email to our close friends and family listing dates we plan to be in Maine over the winter, and inviting people to join us. My sister-in-law and her family (a husband, two daughters and a fiance) responded that they would come up for New Year's weekend. We were very excited. I started planning the menu and the evening right away. 

For cocktails, we mixed sparkling wine with a touch of St. Germain liqueur, and a splash of either fresh pomegranate or grapefruit juice. The hors d'oeuvres were simple but plentiful: grape tomatoes with a dusting of truffle salt, warmed brie topped with fig jam, and thin cucumber rounds topped with a small dollop of plain yogurt and a teaspoon of salmon roe. 

I tend to be better at envisioning hors d'oeuvres, side dishes and desserts than main courses. I usually have to work backwards to find a good entree. Interestingly, because my in-laws keep kosher, I had an easier time planning the main course than if I had no limitations. We decided to go with fish. I made simple stuffed and baked cod fillets that were delicious. I mixed minced garlic, fresh chopped parsley, olive tapenade and a little crumbled feta, then rolled the fish around approximately two tablespoons of the stuffing and baked the rolled fillets in a roasting pan covered with tin foil for about 25 minutes at 350 degree. You'd need more time for thicker fillets and less time for thinner ones, of course. 

For one side dish, I sliced beefsteak tomatoes into thin rounds and patted them dry, then spread each one with a topping of salt, pepper, parsley, chopped walnuts and grated parmesan. I placed those on a cookie sheet and roasted them in the oven at the same time as the fish, until they were halfway dry and the topping was warm and crispy. For another side dish, I made a pot of wild rice mixed with lentils. When people sat down to eat, there were party poppers at their places and round gold candles as a centerpiece. 

Initially, I wanted to make a souffle for dessert, but decided to do something that would be easier to make and would allow me to enjoy the evening. So I made crepes a couple of days in advance and kept them wrapped in wax paper and tin foil in the refrigerator. When it was time for dessert, I warmed them up in the microwave, spread each one with chocolate hazelnut spread and rolled them up. Each portion had two, which I then finished with a scoop of creamy bananas from our new Yonanas machine (this thing is amazing -- it makes bananas taste like ice cream).  

Audrey Hepburn was a no-show, and we did not have a piano player in the corner, but we did have a fabulous time. Happy 2012!