Mama, Drama, and Llama Llama: An Irreverent Guide to Kids' Books

Truth Tuesday

My 20-month-old son loves books. When he first got interested in them, he would grab anything vaguely book-like and demand it be read to him. Goodnight Moon, Personal Finance for Dummies, a CD case, my credit card bill, whatever. But now that he’s become a more sophisticated “reader,” his tastes are more discerning. Certain books never bore him. Others he shoves away, saying “all done,” after only three pages; and still others he refuses to even consider. (Naturally, this last category tends to include books I picked out especially for him.) How he forms his opinions is a mystery to me, but as an adult reader who’s read each of his books aloud about a hundred times, I’ve developed some opinions of my own about toddler books.

And I’m not the only parent (or former child, I should say) who’s formed opinions about literature for the wee ones. A post by Lisa Belkin on the New York Times’ Motherlode blog prompted some strong feelings about Shel Silverstein’s classic The Giving Tree. I won’t rehash that whole discussion here, but suffice it to say, not everyone thinks the book’s story of self-sacrifice is the “right message,” or that such heavy stuff, however engagingly illustrated, is appropriate for children.

A lot of books we loved (or hated) as children become radically different when read again from an adult perspective. Fortunately for me, I haven’t had to deal with any literary moral crises yet. But, my inner critic can still find the most innocuous reasons to hide a book in the back of the shelf...

Books for babies and toddlers seem to fall into one of these categories:

Pictures of stuff. You take a picture of an object, animal, or person, print it on a colorful background, and write the name of the thing in big letters. Repeat 10 times, and voilà! A book for babies! It’s really hard to screw this up.  And yet, I find little things that bother me. Why is the example of “gray” a picture of a gray parrot? I can think of many other things that are more typically gray.  In another book, a goose is incorrectly labeled a duck.

Chock full o’ learnin’.  Serious or folksy, whimsical or dull, these books want you, the parent, to know that your child will learn something.  I appreciate efforts to reinforce the lessons in the story, but I feel like they’re trying too hard sometimes.  Little Quack, a cute, simple story about five little ducklings jumping into the pond one by one, has a “quackulator” at the bottom of each page that says “4 ducks + 1 duck = 5 ducks in the pond!”  Is that really necessary? By the time my kid is able to read and understand equations, I suspect he won’t be interested in this story anymore.

Award winners. These books are works of art. Sumptuously illustrated, loaded with literary references—I love these books, and I get distraught when my adorable scamp decides to chew on the pages instead of basking in the light of beauty and truth. I’m not saying you should avoid them, just try not to cry too hard when your child rejects “The Rime of the Ancient Mariner” told in illustrations based on illuminated manuscripts in favor of the exploits of a certain naughty monkey.

Books that emotionally manipulate mommy and daddy.  I have a love-hate-cry relationship with those books that push all your emotional buttons. Guess How Much I Love You, Love You Forever, and similar titles seem to be written more for our misty-eyed benefit than for the child’s. We’ve got a beautiful book called My Mother is Mine. I love the drawings of animals in this book, but it puts me in the uncomfortable position of reading out loud, “My mother is pretty. My mother is sweet.” Not that these statements are false (ha) but is this for him, or for me?

Books that get it right.  The books that my son and I seem to agree on are the ones that don’t get stuck trying to impart some kind of wisdom. Silly stories with just enough repetition to make your child chime in, but not so much that you want to shoot yourself in the head.  Pictures that are recognizable but not dumb, pretty and creative but not incomprehensible.  Stories with many possible interpretations, if the reader wants to ponder them—or perhaps none at all besides “hey, let’s laugh together.” Like baby bear’s stolen porridge, some books are juuuuust right.

Got any faves or duds of your own? Books you read as a child that totally ruined your life? Discuss!

(Photo by Jennifer Bishop)

Comments

[Andrew]

It may be stating the obvious, but don't forget there is a public library. These books are free, renewable online (since we are all very busy), and chances are the librarians are picking very good books (think Caldecott winners) not written by celebrities.

[JenBeee]

True. Libraries and used book sales are the best places to find good books, in my opinion. I've found some really wonderful stories at the library that turn out to be out of print when I try to buy them on Amazon.

You can find good books in unexpected places. I found a reprint of one of my childhood favorites at Anthropologie. (For the uninitiated, that's a boho-chic women's clothing and home decor store.) "Manners Can Be Fun" by Munro Leaf. This is a book that is truly written for children; it delivers its message in a funny way without condescending. Kids think the primitive stick-figure drawings are really funny. Sure, the manners may be from the 1930s, but your aunt will be charmed to death when your little one doffs his hat, offers his hand, and says "how do you do?"

[Phaedra Cucina]

I love kids' books, too. My two favorites, Ish and The Dot, are both by the same author, Peter Reynolds. Both books have great messages, and kids can certainly relate. I know I'm in the minority, but my kids and I can find some of the award winners, especially the old ones, rather dull. Books are so helpful in teaching kids, as well as entertaining them. That's what motivated me to write a kid's book myself, My Mommy's on a Business Trip, when my three yr old started having fits everytime I left for an airport. It helped her feel better, and therefore, it helped me! www.mommytrip.com