Dear Kelly Ripa, Please Leave The Magic To Us

Truth Tuesday

I was going to write some really cool and potentially uplifting or inspirational stuff in this space today.  

But this week.....I want to talk about real life (which, yes, can also be quite uplifting and inspirational). 

And by "real life," I mean what most of us are living. As opposed to the "magical" lives filled with "magical" advice and worship of "magical" beings.

Here's what happened:

I was at the eye doctor's office with my 12-year-old son. We had arrived just in the nick of time, which was quite magical in and of itself since I had only remembered the appointment 15 minutes before. Granted, we had forgotten to bring his eyeglasses (of course)-- but we were there nonetheless.

As we sat in the seating area and waited for his pupil dilation to be complete (or whatever is supposed to happen), I picked up a Redbook Magazine and began to thumb through it somewhat absent-mindedly.

Kelly Ripa is on the cover of the issue (January 2010) with the pull-out quote: "I feel like I should apologize for everything." 

Um...ok. I know where this is headed. I figured it was the typical in-depth-but-totally-shallow profile: Meet famous star/personality. Show how gorgeous and together she is while also having her admit she is just oh-so much like the rest of us -- she is disorganized, ditzy, off-schedule or whatever. (It was.)

So we look up to her and try to learn her "magic tricks" while we see she is just so much like us! Cool! 

Right?

These profiles are part of the reason I have given up most magazines and other media -- they don't reflect me or even sound like anyone I know. I'd take my friends and favorite bloggers any day if I am looking for real voices, for lessons, for humor, for being OK with my imperfections.

So, anyway, despite all this, I read the piece. Because I was at the eye doctor's office and didn't have a whole lot else to do. (And probably The Universe was toying with me because I had just recently tweeted about Kelly Ripa and the totally-unrealistic Electrolux commercials.) 

There wasn't much new...or exciting...or even interesting in the piece. And that's OK. That's what those puff pieces are for. 

(Sorry, Redbook, but it is the truth. Real Moms and Real Women crave connection with other Real Moms and other Real Women. Enough Kelly Ripas and Angelina Jolies. Gives us the messiness and awesomeness of reality. Call me, Redbook, if you need more insight.)

So I read about Kelly, her kids, her insistence that they are polite to all they meet, the sacredness of their weekends, her very real non-star girlfriends and the utter loveable-ness and hot-ness and amazing-ness of her husband Mark. (She reiterates how she is never recognized in public because she is so ordinary -- it is her striking husband whose good looks always give them away!)

Super!

She even talks about how hard it is to work on a marriage and how important it is to her:

'We argue but we have an allegiance to each other, and we have beautiful children, and from what I hear, divorce sucks. It's not something I think I have the fortitude to go through."

Kelly, that is so great. Sounds like you are a real girl and a normal girl who was thrust into the world of Manhattan and Regis and stardom. (And by the way, divorce doesn't suck for everyone, but that's a topic for another day. Since Kelly is a Magical Being, she can get away with generalizations that don't reflect real life in any way and still sound cute!)

Funny....we look up to these stars and take in their magic, and they then spend the entire interview telling us how normal they are. 

And the bigger picture: Why are we looking up to women who have little to teach us or show us? 

Why are we trying to model ourselves after non-reality when reality is totally doable and awesome? 

Why aren't we connecting more with one another instead of taking fiction and trying mightily to apply it to our non-fiction lives?

As I read this over, it sounds like I am cynical and angry. Actually, just the opposite: It took me getting really centered and happy to realize what a role model really is. 

Or where the lessons really lie. 

Or what magic really is. 

Kelly Ripa is cute and famous and happy and sweet and fun. And that is awesome! Maybe she is the Girl Next Door, maybe not. 

But at the end of the day, she has little to share or offer me or my friends (and by "friends," I mean YOU, too). At least not in this format. 

Maybe if we were to meet and speak in person, I'd get a real person. But this is not a real person, not in this medium. 

The truth? I'd rather read about YOU and know YOU -- how your morning routine goes, what you do when your kid asks you a ridiculously sticky personal question, what your love life is like, who your best friend is, what you last pigged out on or what prompted your last really, really good cry. 

Without the lights, without the makeup, without the canned lessons and, please, without the fake magic. 

Because what you do every single day in reality is, in my humble opinion, the stuff that magic is really made of.

And because YOU Uncensored is pretty magical. Even on the most non-magical of days. 

Comments

[Tom]

Allison:
Another great column. As someone who left journalism partly because of the growing focus on celebrity gossip as "news" - I completely agree. Maybe Kelly R. is the girl next door. But not because she tells us she is.

I'm much more interested in real people, real stories. So keep on writing and teaching us. I'm not a current mom, or even a "current dad" but your insights are about life, and there are lessons for all of us in there!

[Kelly Carter]

Hey Allison... great article and fabulous insight. Personally, I can't get wrapped up in the whole celebrity thing and I have a few friends that are thrust right in the middle. I guess I've always known they are just people. Some have insights to share others perhaps not so much. Each is afforded their own place and purpose in the universe.

I haven't had the privilege of reading your articles before and now that I know where to look I'll check back often. Thanks again.

PS
Let me know when you are ready for that coffee or tea. My treat! :)

[twitter.com/ElizabethPW]

As you know ... our lives are more interesting than any celebrity or reality show or fictional characters. I mean, seriously. Hence why I don't watch TV or read magazines anymore. Real life is much more juicy.

[Katherine]

Love this post! I agree that the struggles/insights/stories of my neighbors are much more engaging than celebrities. And yet ... you made it all the way through the profile and I am betting I would've also. Is it just a habit to be interested in celebrities? Will we outgrow it? Maybe that's a topic for your next blog post??

[Allison Nazarian]

Hi Tom,
Thank you!
I agree -- give me "boring" real people any day. Because you know what -- real is NOT boring!
xo ~ Alli

[Allison Nazarian]

Hi Kelly!
Thank you for your comment.
You can read here on this blog or on mine (it's my name dot com).
Would love to have coffee, I will msg you on Facebook!
xo ~ Alli

[Allison Nazarian]

Hi Elizabeth,
yes SOOOO juicy :)
xo ~ Alli

[Allison Nazarian]

HI Katherine,
I was thinking along the same lines!
Especially these questions:

Why are we looking up to women who have little to teach us or show us?

Why are we trying to model ourselves after non-reality when reality is totally doable and awesome?

Why aren't we connecting more with one another instead of taking fiction and trying mightily to apply it to our non-fiction lives?

Great minds..... xo ~Alli

[Lea]

Allison - I LOVE this. You've put into words so much of what I've been feeling about our celebrity-crazed culture. Boring! Predictable! I didn't know you were writing over here... great place. :) I'll be stopping by again soon.

[Lyn]

Well, that's kind of what blogs are for!

(And have been for years -- the world of online journals preceded weblogs, and was made up of mostly women -- some truly amazing non-celebrity women were part of that early community..)