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Friday, November 06, 2009

Comments

Jessica

Hey Jenny,

It is funny, because as aware as I am of being stereotyped myself and protesting vehemently when it happens, I am very guilty of stereotyping Jeff in our roles. I don't often even give him the chance to make dinner, or do dishes, or sort laundry, because I always know I'll just do a better job. I should really try to intentionally give some of this up sometimes, even if the job isn't done exactly as I would do it.

On another note, I am reading Nurture Shock, which I am sure you have probably already read or at least heard about. I think it makes some very good points and will try to incorporate many of the ideas into my parenting, but something kept appearing again and again in the writing. Po Bronson co-wrote the book with a woman (can't remember her name, Amy something?) Anyway, it was more often "his" voice that came through. Several times, the authors made reference to women in terribly obnoxious, stereotypical, sexist, and downright shallow ways. Just two examples were flippant comments about women being innately drawn to high-heeled shoes and manicures. It almost made me throw the book across the room and never open it again. How infuriating. Haven't women shaken these assumptions off yet? Ugh.

Tricia G

Your thank you note story made me laugh. I had the exact same experience with wedding thank you notes and I still sometimes find myself cringing internally when I see friends of my husband's family, knowing that some of them were never thanked for gifts we use to this day. My husband has probably never given those unwritten thank you notes a second thought. For me, that might be the biggest gender difference--he moves on (which is healthy, I must admit) while I worry. Thanks for the post.

Katherine

What a wonderful story of the son and mom and dirty dishes. It is scary how much our children internalize gendered messages that we never transmit. Like my daughter telling me that girls can't do x, y, or z. Makes me want to scream -- or make someone else do a sink full of dirty dishes.

Laura J

Great article Jenny. I like your wit and observations.

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