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Thursday, August 27, 2009



What a thoughtful post -- as someone who has always wanted to be a mother, it's interesting to hear the perspective of someone formerly on the "child-free" path. I agree with you that some human activities can't be shoehorned into a market-based philosophical framework. For instance: love, spiritual faith...


Kim's post offers a great example that all parents can learn from. Her post, I agree, was not intended to offend. Just as similar comments I heard from friends, family and colleagues that cut me to the bone weren't either. Why is it that society rarely if ever considers just how offensive such casual commentary like this from parents truly is?

The visceral responses are due in large part to the startling prejudice and indifference that couples without children face. Five years ago when I was first struggling to accept that I never could create a child with the man I love I, too, would have written an angry response. Now I simply want parents to understand that appearances (e.g. a couple without children and how they got that way) aren't always what they seem. This was so important to me that I spent several years reliving my infertility nightmare to write an honest and at time absurd account of what it's like for couples in my situation. The book is also for those who care enough to want to understand. I want my nieces and nephews -- and everyone else's children -- to live in society that has greater sensitivity and less prejudice.

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