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Things I Love About the Internet - Part 1

Tech Tuesday

Everyone is always talking about all the bad stuff online. I know that’s the job of the news agencies - they get paid to scare us - but millions of people still travel to cyberspace every day.

There's got to be a good reason, right?

The reason in some cases is hard to figure out - cyberbullying, online hate crimes and destructive websites come to mind. I suppose it's all a part of the human experience and at least we can actively choose not to visit those portions of the web we find disturbing. I find some peoples obsession with TMZ.com disturbing so that proves it's all a matter of relevance.

For all the current and potential pitfalls and dangerous information to be found, there are several reasons I am a huge fan of the internet and in some cases, don't wish to remember all that well what life was like without it. In the next series of posts I will be discussing those reasons starting now with:
Like-Minded People.

The Tech Generation is Here

Tech Tuesday

My six-year-old daughter is a zookeeper. She's got all sorts of animals in her zoo, from the standard tigers and bears to the more exotic peppermint striped zebra.

Hers is a Tiny Zoo – one of the many free apps down-loadable on the iPhone.

When I first let her start using our iTouch at the age of four, I felt a little weird. After all, it's not like I had anything like this when I was her age. The most sophisticated pieces of technology in our house back then were the phone and the television and I wasn't allowed to use either of those by myself.

It wasn't a safety issue, either. Fear for her safety if she broke it perhaps, but how could she hurt herself with a slim little device? I felt weird because I, like so many other parents my age, are entering a realm unfamiliar to us: kids with technology.

Quick Thoughts on Parents and Pseudonymity

Technology Tuesday

Debate continues to swirl around Google's ill-conceived and poorly-implemented (I'm trying to be charitable here) policy regarding what people are allowed to call themselves on GooglePlus. I have extremely strong views on this question, from nearly every angle: technology, policy, social implications, and practicality. In short, though, my view comes down to my belief that as a matter of fundamental self-determination and respect for human rights, people should be able to decide for themselves how they wish to be named in a social situation. Google does not agree.

Those who have the knee-jerk response of "Well, anyone who doesn't want to use their real name has got something to hide or is just out to cause trouble" are, at best, cosmically misinformed. The notion that if "real names" (a term which, by the way, is nearly impossible to define - go ahead, give it a try) are good enough for the wealthy geeks at Google it should be good enough for anyone just reeks of massive privilege. (Frankly, the way Google's been implementing their 'policy' also reeks of colonialism - if you've got a nice, comfortable looking 'wasponym' as your name at G+, you're probably fine, it seems, at least based on what people have been documenting about their clownish banning and reinstatement behavior so far.) I've been reading, thinking, and writing about identity and privacy stuff for more than a decade, and the more I learn, the more I come to agree with jwz, who said:

the other night I had dinner with a friend which turned into an hour long argument over it, because he thought that forcing everyone to use their real names was just fine. This is someone I've known for decades, so to say that I was shocked and horrified by his attitude is an understatement. It was as if my friend had suddenly started beginning sentences with, "I'm not a racist, but..."

Then there are those who like to offer the oh-so-sage advice: "If you don't like, it leave." But that's pretty naive as well.  As Alice Marwick noted in this post (do read the whole thing):

High Tech Parenting

Therapy Tuesday
Photo By: dcjohn

I read a blog the other day that got me thinking. Janice D'Arcy writes a regular blog for the Washington Post called "On Parenting."  A recent post caught my attention and got me thinking--how do parents decide about technology for their kids.

Most parents that I work with are completely clueless when it comes to technology and this can be a dangerous situation. Not that I'm suggesting that parents get on the latest trends, but some familiarity is important. D'Arcy writes about cell phones, and how old is old enough to give a child one. There is a specific phone, the Teddyphone that is marketed for toddlers. It's amazing that our species has survived if it is deemed necessary for a toddler to have a working cell phone. A toy phone is one thing, but a real one seems to cross the line. Who does a 4-year-old need to call?

A few weeks ago, my husband overheard our son talk to a friend at school. The two of them were arranging a play-date and were very specific about it. They determined location and even a day. My husband was so impressed, that he felt that we needed to make it happen. This is an example of play imitating life. Actually having the play-date reinforces many things to our son: he can make decisions, he is heard by his parents, and he is learning what the social and expected norms are.

Intuitively, children seem to have a knack for technology. It can be hard to keep up. And while technology has many wonderful things to offer, the fallout can be difficult to predict. Who would have known that Facebook could have a darker side to it such as cyber stalking and a forum for bullying? No matter how old your children are, there are some questions you can ask yourself before allowing them to take on new technologies.

1. What is the short-term gain for my child?
2. What potential issues can I see?
3. Do I understand how it is used and can I monitor it?
4. How did kids survive without this?

As summer winds down and school is nearing, technology and trends are going to be important to many kids. Hopefully, this helps to navigate them.

The Downside of Email

Image via Wikipedia

 

Work Wednesday

A lot of people prefer to use email as a workplace communication tool. Many people will tell you it simplifies things, is quicker and doesn’t leave a lot of room for prolonged discussion or debate like phone calls or  face-to-face communication do.  While this may seem to be true, these things are actually some of the downsides of using email for work communication.

I’m not an overly enthusiastic fan of the phone as a means of communication. I have a tough time figuring out how to get off the phone with people who aren’t good at recognizing the signals that end a conversation and I find phone interviews a little difficult. In a face-to-face conversation, I find it a lot easier to follow the natural tangents and still come back to the original conversation or talking points.

I used to think email was a good compromise because it allowed me to ask what I wanted to ask or say what I wanted to say, read the other person’s response and then follow-up with my thoughts. More recently, I’ve realized there are some significant disadvantages for using email for work related communication. 

• Email is emotionless. That means recipients are more likely to ascribe their own emotions to the message. In fact, in an article discussing how emotion is communicated (or miscommunicated) via email, Kristin Byron, a professor at Syracuse University’s Whitman School of Management, found that the inability to use nonverbal cues in email makes misinterpretation of the intended emotion much more likely. Recipients often interpret positive emails as neutral and neutral emails as having negative emotional connotations.

• People tend to drop the niceties in work emails. It’s very poor social etiquette to start a telephone or face-to-face conversation without a simple greeting or “How are you?” I’ve received a number of emails that jump right into “I need this from you” without even so much as a “Hi.” Even the emails I’ve sent that start out with some small talk sometimes seem stilted or as if I’m trying too hard to find a gentle way into a conversation.

• It’s not always easy to know when the conversation is over. I struggle with this and I’m sure others do too.  Once the meat of the discussion is complete, when do you stop the conversation? How many times do you have to email back a “thank you” before it’s too much?  What if somebody is expecting a response from you and you didn’t think it required one? This can easily lead to misunderstandings about your commitment to a project or whether you’re going to be a team player.

Ideally, face-to-face communication would be the best way to conduct business. Unfortunately, with global workplaces and a tremendous increase in telecommuting, that’s not always an option. There are a few thing you can do to help, though.